Falling into nothing
by thehawksarrows
Summary: After New York, Clint is having a hard time sleeping and working at SHIELD, feeling that everyone he blaming him for the death of so many agents and Coulson. He falling more and more into nothing each passing day.
1. Nightmares

The room was dark and cold freezing cold in fact. There stood a long old mirror with bright blue eyes that glowed with bloods on his hands with a evil dark smiled pulled on his lips. Then blood dripped from his hand to the floor the showed other agent that were wearing SHIELD jackets. The man in the then jumped out the mirror and Clint shot up out of the deep sleep and grab his knife under his pillow, his heart racing and his eyes closed he was to scared to open them because he didn't know if he was himself or Under Loki's control again. He pulled the knife along his wrist to see if her was still himself and ruby red blood fell from his wrist. That wasn't the first time Clint had done something like this at all. He pulled himself out of the bed and went to the bathroom and ran his wist under the cold tap, He looked at himself in the mirror. He didn't know who he was anymore. He looked like death warmed up and walking around. Dark rings under his eyes and hie skin looked paler then normal. He was a ghost of the man he used to be.

He went back to his room and pulled on some gym cloths and cover up his wrist and headed for the gym to try and pass the time because it was 3 in the morning and no one else would be up yet. But he was wrong there was someone there.


	2. Long morning

Clint made his way into the gym to find no other then Steve training at this time of the morning had become a norm to the other man. Clint thought about just leaving and going back to his room but that was the last place he wanted to he went to the range at the back of the gym. Deep down he hoped that Steve didn't notice him come in at all but of course he had to turn round and see him. "Agent Barton. Your up early." He said voice filled with worry Steve always worry about other. Clint nodded and rubbed his wrist. "Steve how many times do have to tell you call me Clint." He said and moved to pick up his bow and his arrows and place them on his back.

"Why are you up anyway?" Clint asked before he could ask him.

Steve chuckled. "I'm always up at this time training."

Clint nodded and then went in the range. "Well have fun with that." He said and closed the door. "And I'll have my fun." He smiled and look at the range the one place he could clear his head and lose himself in something he loved without anyone bugging him well not at this time anyway.

Hours passed by and before anyone knew it the sun was raising and it was almost six a clock and Steve left about an hour ago so Clint let the range and went to the kitchen to get some coffee before he had to hear Tony complaining about a hangover or have to face Natasha and try to lie to her about what's up with the cuts on wrist. He make some coffee then got himself a cup and just lead on the worktop and just like he thought Natasha was the first to show her self and she was just a real sweetheart in the morning. "Morning Tasha." He smiled at her then put his coffee down to get her a cup and passed it her.

Natasha took the cup. "Morning Clint." She looked and it was almost as if she could see right through him and as hey looked at each other almost having they was talking that way and Natasha was the first to talk. "What the hell have you done now Barton?" She ask and put the cup down and crossed her arms and her bright green eyes piecing at him. With a sigh struggled. "I couldn't sleep so I went down to the range and I nip me wrist with the bow string It nothing really Nata." Before he said anything else she grad his hand and turned it to look at his arm. "Clint is that what really happened?" She asked and looked him in the eyes. He nodded. "Yeah that really did happen Natasha."

Now Natasha was no fool and she knew Clint was lying to her just by the tone of his voice. "If you say so." Was she said then and get go of his wrist and then sipped her coffee still watching him.

Clint the sipped his coffee and looked at her he knew she knew he was lying and he would tell her everything later on but right now hasn't the time or place to do so.

"Fury sending you on a mission anytime soon?" He asked.

"Not that I know of." She said in a cool tone.

"So your off today then?" He smiled at her.

"Yes what are you trying to get at her Clint?"

Clint smirked. "Well I'm not asking you on a date. You want to know whats up with me and I sure as hell don't want the others knowing so call it a filed trip just just two where we can talk like normal people."

Natasha had a small smile on her face. "12 a clock we can got walk around the park. Don't be late Barton or I will find you and make you tell me everything."

Clint chuckled and nodded. "When have I even been late?" He said and hen point at her. "Don't even say Budapest cause that was your fault."


End file.
